WHERE THE HEART IS.

What is a home? Is it a place or a feeling?


How long before you feel "at home" with a place or a person?


The dictionary defines home in various ways; whether it is used as a noun, as an adjective or as a verb, it is commonly pertained to as a place, as an object if you may.


What does it mean to be home? How do you know if you're home?


For me, home is a feeling.


In a person's lifetime, one can feel at home with many different people and in many different places. Perhaps that's why there's this thing we call "comfort zone". And if one is taken away from their comfort zones, they experience a great deal of unease and uncertainty. Put them in an unfamiliar place and you get someone who is lost and probably scared. Probably.


I'd like to think that I'm the kind of person who can easily adjust and adapt. I normally find it easy to make friends or acquaintances at least. Perhaps it is because I am very open and VERY talkative. This doesn't mean though, that I easily let just anyone in. To put it simply, home is not everywhere for me.


My job (or my boss, I think) requires me to move around a bit. I guess it is inevitable, given that the company I'm working with is in its early beginnings. Since I've started, I've been moved twice to different locations. First from Makati to Sucat then from Sucat to Alabang. Fast forward. I'm moving for the 3rd time. And this time, I'm doing it with a heavy heart.


Not to be too emotional or anything but really, this is the hardest move I've ever had to make. I was in Sucat for the longest time and that is really where I felt the most at home, with the place and more importantly, with the people. They became my work family. When I moved to Alabang, I was a bit hesitant and it took me a while to adjust. I kept waiting to feel at home with the place... and I'm still waiting. Yesterday, I had a chance to let it sink in that I really was about to leave... then it hit me. The people in Alabang, my friends, they're what I can call home.


I admit, it has not been easy for me to get to know each of them but when I finally did, it was such a blessing.


Macee--She was always fun to be around. With her I can talk about the most mundane topics and yet still find something in it to laugh about. The sound of her laugh is priceless. She is one of the most real people I have ever known.


JC--He has always been reserved that's why every time he has something to say, I take the time to really listen. Super intelligent in his own way at funny even when he doesn't mean to crack a joke. JC, I will never forget the day I discussed the RH bill and Divorce with you. Winner ka!

Chase--What can I say? Napaka-sweet! Seriously! I will miss his swabe hirits and fleeting hugs. And his very malambing voice.


Ira--How do I even begin to describe who she is to me? She's everyone's shock absorber but she'll always be my "arte buddy". I have never met anyone so arte and so cute while doing it! I super enjoy her company and even if she argues, she is like an Ate to me.

They're the group of the most amazing people I've ever worked with. Along with my Sucat family, of course. Paano ka naman hindi malulungkot na mahihiwalay ka sa kanila? I am sure I will still see them from time to time (hindi pwedeng hinde!) so for now I will just say,


See you around.


I will miss you everyday.

Meet Ira, Macee, Chase and JC :)

 

THOUGHTS ON A RAINY DAY.

We're no longer allowed to access FB and stream videos here at work (BOO!), it's the only thing I ever look forward to everyday and now it's taken away from us :( 

Given this unfortunate incident (yes, unfortunate talaga!) I looked for an alternative so I'd be less bored while I sit here watching the rain. Luckily, I came across Bianca Gonzales' blog site www.iamsuperbianca.com and surprisingly I enjoyed reading her posts. She seems very intelligent with the way she writes and narrates her day-to-day experiences, her photos are interesting plus, her outreach activities are very inspiring. While browsing through her site, I remembered I had my own! I've always attempted to keep my own blog site updated but I've always failed at it. Probably because I am seldom inspired by my daily activities. Which is a sad thing, really. I realized, maybe I need to do something to make my days more interesting. The hard part is figuring out what it is I need to do.

Look for a new job maybe? Take up a new hobby? Read more books? Learn something new?

Let's see what I can come up with. Perhaps I can now keep this blog site updated.

KEEPING MYSELF SANE.

work + good book + chocolate = easy wednesday afternoon =)

QUESTION.

Where do you see yourself 5 years from now?




Hopefully, not here.

THINK.

Have you been paying attention?

FINGERS. PALMS. HANDS.

Yesterday, I saw two boys with no hands.

I was on my way to work, on my usual morning commute when I chanced upon this boy, about 16 or 17 years old, who was on his way to school. I assumed so because he was carrying a small College Algebra book. Along with the book was a small coin purse. I was so amazed at how easily he opened its zipper, got the money and paid for his fare. I then wondered how he got dressed for school that morning, how he tied the laces on his shoe... Did someone help him? What about when he sits in his class? How will he jot down notes?

We were on this jeepney ride for about 15 minutes and we sat in front of each other... I couldn't help staring at him not because I pitied him and not because I found him odd. It was because I admired him. He had this carefree look on his face and I can tell he was used to people eyeing him... but still, he had this small, almost secret smile on his lips.

He got off the jeepney before I did.

I thought he wasn't to cross my mind again until I saw another boy, younger than the first, with no hands. I was waiting at the bus stop when he and his mother passed by me. I saw him smiling up at his mother.

And then I wondered, "Two boys with no hands in a day... God, are you trying to tell me something?"

I thought of all the things I wouldn't be able to do if I had no hands...

I wouldn't be able to write, something I consider a vital part of who I am.
I wouldn't be able to cook or bake, something my Mom does that I admire and I want to be good at too.
I wouldn't be able to hold hands with my friends or loved ones, something I always do.
I wouldn't be able to hold a book, one of the many joys I find in reading.
I wouldn't be able to touch, one thing I do when words fail me.
I wouldn't be able to give high fives to my colleagues when we do something brilliant, to my friends when we laugh at something, to my nephew when he does something great.
I wouldn't be able to put on make up or fix my hair, the one thing I do to make myself feel better when I feel that nothing is going right.
I wouldn't be able to give myself pedicures, one of my guilty pleasures.
I wouldn't be able to type a text to my friends or this blog for that matter.
I wouldn't be able to wash and iron clothes or fix my things.

There's so much more I can say that I would not be able to do if I had no hands but most of them for myself... did you notice? It's true, God might have been telling me to be grateful that I am complete... and I am. But I also realized that maybe, God is telling me to make my hands more useful by extending it to others who need my help. There are a lot of things people who don't have hands can do because they have the will to do it. Think of how much more people like us can do if we only try.

To the two wonderful boys who inspired me to write this blog, I wish you well. I hope the world will be kind to both of you and that you won't let your disability get in the way of reaching your dreams. I hope you'll continue to inspire strangers like me. I send my love to the wind and hope that when it reaches you, you'll smile.

SEEING RED.

Do you still remember the first time you fell in love?
Do you still remember that first smile you shared, that first time you locked eyes with each other?
Do you still remember the rush you felt the first time you held hands?


Lately, I've been thinking about these feelings.. what most people would probably describe as feelings that you felt back when you were in high school, when you were a bit more naive than you realize, when everything was sunshine and rainbow, when you didn't know yet what being heartbroken really meant. Admit it, you were once like that too. I know I was.


As a young girl, I was a sucker for anything romantic. I loved watching movies that make me giggle and blush. I loved watching couples as they gazed into each other's eyes, as if everything else around them suddenly slipped away and all that mattered was that moment. Oh yes, I believed and hoped that one day I, too, will have a moment of my own.


True enough, I had them. "Them" being the operative word, I assume you realize that I've had a fair share of these moments... and with different people. Each one was special in it's own way and the intensity of the feelings were different on so many levels as well but there are a few that really stand out. It still makes me smile every time I remember them. These moments and the people I shared them with will, cliche as this may sound, always be treasured.


But I'm no longer that young girl... I'm 24 and not living in a dream world anymore. Here, it isn't always sunshine and rainbow. Here, tears are more real, affairs happen, love may not be reciprocated, trust is broken and lies are told. See, these are the things that sometimes make people stop believing in love. But me, I've been through hell and back but still, I believe in those magical moments.


It's true that you might not always get a rush everytime you see that one person... you might not feel so giggly each time that someone tells you how beautiful you are... you might not always remember how it feels like everytime you hold hands or look each other in the eye... you might argue once in a while and ignore each other... but I guess what really counts are those moments when you do feel your heart flutter at just the most fleeting touch of that person's hand... those moments when you're simply left breathless by those sweet, unexpected kisses... those moments when you catch the corner of your lips lifting up into a familiar smile that turns into a giggle just because you see that one person. They don't happen all the time, every single day... but they do happen.

And when it does, hold on to it.